Once upon a time, on platform called Blogspot, I created three blogs. The most prolific was about music, and I would write almost every day. I had to eventually step back, but think of those posts often. I think of the feedback, the gratitude shown by some of the musicians that I've covered, and over the past year, I've started meeting some of those musicians in person. A friend has asked me why I don't try writing a music blog, and I think that I'm ready to get back into writing.
I was trying all last night to think of a fitting name, and an idea struck me like lightning when I woke up today. Rock Lobster (because of someone's single post account from 2004, my URL is spelled with zeros in the place of the o's). In some ways, this is a combination of my previous accounts, and I plan to reprint some of my old posts on this blog. My old posts would cover music, comics, TV shows, and sometime reviews of ice cream. This all left me wondering how I could streamline these posts.
I could make it as much about music as about my day-to-day queer lifestyle (fitting with my homage to the B-52's).
In 2016, I was just starting to become less self-conscious of my interests. Back then, I was already opening up about my love of Gail Simone comics and female singer-songwriters, but I was just starting to clear out insecurities I had about being trans. I had a disconnected relationship with my maleness for many years, and would joke that I was probably "a lesbian in a man's body". When I read a GQ article about Kristen Beck, I wasn't expecting how much I could relate to this decorated Navy SEAL. It must've been late 2015 when I met an Australian corrections officer (and military veteran) on Second Life. In a simulated world that you experience through avatars, I started experimenting with female presentation, and it was freeing. My Aussie girlfriend helped me to get a better understanding of my likely trans-ness. It's hard to explain how sensual our relationship became. Aside from physical intimacy (experienced vicariously through our avatars), everything else was deep, tender, and thought-provoking dialogue. Sometimes, we'd read books, and discuss them together. Imagine the closeness experienced in cybersex, and you're halfway to what we were feeling. In June 2016, a significant tragedy occurred at the Pulse night club in Orlando, Florida. I decided that even if I wasn't clear what I am represent in the LGBTQ community, there was no moment like the present to start becoming less self-conscious and explore my identity. I started playing Pokemon Go the next year, and created a female presence in that game integrated with our tangible world. In 2019, I started experimenting with hosiery, and that led to sweaters, breast implants, bras, and a clear realization that I'm a trans woman.
At this point, there's only so many people who see me as a woman (I started seeing physical appearance as a means through which I had miscommunication my inner self for so long). It was about one year ago that I started wearing breast inserts outside the house. I boldly wore my A-Cups when seeing Elton John at the Barclays Center in March. Sir Elton is such a big icon that one that watching him perform with his longtime band, I was watching people who had played together in just about every recording on YouTube and (or) DVD that I've seen. I was under the same roof as the man who recorded music for the Lion King, who performed with George Michael, Marc Bolan, Billy Joel, and the Who. My sister got more out of seeing him perform, but I've seen better shows. In this case, it's not all something wrong with Elton John, but I saw a 2019 show that was so engaging that the bar was set pretty high.
I began committing to the goal of wearing inserts to each show that I went to. The Dollyrots' show in Cambridge was my next live event. They're this "mom & pop" duo that I'd describe as a combination of Letters to Cleo and the Ramones. I had reviewed two songs of there's in 2016, and received a "Thank you." note from Kelly Ogden and Luis Cabezas. They're so personable that it's like meeting Benetar & Giraldo. I had fractured my arm earlier in the summer, so I asked the Dollyrots (and their drummer) if they could sign my sling. Kelly was excitedly getting her leather jacket signed by the fans. It's sentimental and sweet that throughout the tour, you could see people's signatures joining the band through the stops along the tour. It wasn't long after the Dollyrots played Central Square that they were in the studio with Stevie Van Zandt of the E Street Band (and there in the photo were representations of the fans Kelly had seen through the tour). An awkward moment about the Dollyrots show was that an insert ruptured. I learned how to make a Scotch tape patch, and learned to back-up boobs on standby. The consistency of the silicone is more like Jell-O, so it wasn't too messy.
While on summer staycation, I fulfilled a summertime goal of wearing a romper out. Yes, it was bold, and I hadn't quite found women's footwear that fit my extra narrow size 13's (11.5 in the men's sizing system). It was as good a time as any to wear a romper out (a cute olive green one that fits well), and I got to draw some landscapes from along the Greater Boston coastline. That night, I saw that The Scorpions were touring with Thundermother and Whitesnake through North America. I cared less about seeing Whitesnake, but the Scorpions are titans of metal, and Thundermother is a band I had been listening to since before the pandemic. I would describe Thundermother (five gregarious Nordic femmes from Sweden) as having an AC/DC type of sound, and Guernica Mancini's theatric singing reminds me of Rob Halford. I was talking with a friend of mine through Facebook Messenger, and wondered what it would be like for even Thundermother and the Scorps to reach a New England venue. That's when I found out that the Rock Believer tour was coming to Foxwoods Casino in Connecticut. Whitesnake bowed out of the tour Singer Tom Coverdale's health understandably is more important I told that same friend that I may have just manifested the my Thundermother/Scorpions doubleheader experience. I started hammering in place all of the arrangements to get time off from my day job one the concert date, and then coordinate a trip on Amtrak and a night's stay at the local Hilton. It was pretty long trip to New London, CT, and up to the reservation on a regional bus. There was no set schedule for those buses, so I mostly relied on Uber when getting between my hotel and the casino. It was all worth it when the concert was about to start. There I was with my jeans, tee, A-Cups, and leather crossbody bag, and everyone was respectful. I was just another fan, and one of the younger fans in attendance. Thundermother blew people away, and when the couple next to me asked their name, I showed off my new t-shirt. Even in the relatively small theater, there was a sense of community, and one-ness when the whole audience would sing along with the band. One such communal singing moment was during "Wind of Change" which had been altered into a protesting vigil for Ukraine. The audience was conscious of the song's original meaning, what it means to the band members (who grew up just to the west of the Iron Curtain), and the important message made by the alteration. The whole venue sung together in solidarity. I can only imagine the courage that it took June when this was performed at Tauron Arena Kraków last June. Seeing Thundermother was something similar to the Dollyrots experience, only this band was touring the US for the first time and were almost 4,000 miles from home. I had listened to them on Pandora, and watched their performances on YouTube. Now, (as with other concerts, it was a shared experience. Occurring in real time in and around me. I then saw on social as Thundermother continued to tour the United States, experiencing different cultures and cuisines.
To all my readers, I graciously thank you for reaching this point in my blog post. I've been clacking away at my keyboard for hours, and a sophomoric Britney Spears single is playing me out. That's right, part of my being less self conscious is openly expressing how I enjoy ABBA, Britney, Aqua, and the Spice Girls as much as I enjoy AC/DC, Led Zeppelin, and the Foo Fighters. I promise that I'll be back tomorrow night with the conclusion of me introduction (and my look back at 2022 concerts). I look forward to taking the Rock Blogster project further, and look forward to the opportunity to share with you all. It can even be a give and take. As long as you keep things civil and respectful, I welcome your comments.
Until next time,
Ken
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